A Different Kind of Tired

When we lived in Atlanta, we were working 12-hour days during the week, sometimes on the weekends. We had limited seasonal access to truly nutritious food, dependent upon what the farmers provided at the seasonal markets. We were buying our drinking water at the store from glass bottles, constantly battling traffic and pollution.

None of those things seemed particularly dramatic on their own. But collectively, they created a way of living that never really allowed us to fully exhale.

That is probably one of the biggest things I’ve noticed since moving here.

Being on the farm, our nervous systems have downregulated.

It could be said that we have more things to actually be stressed about. Most everything we do is something we are learning for the first time or developing a system for, so it takes extra time and effort. There is always another project, another animal to care for, something growing that needs attention, or a system that needs to be figured out.

And yet, there is this foundation of calm that I now work from. I may have a much larger to-do list, but it is much easier to take it one step at a time.

I can have a day filled with physical work and still feel deeply grounded at the end of it.

I still feel like I’m on vacation when I wake up in the morning. It feels like vacation because it is so calming to be living in nature. Usually, when I experience something like that, it is also met with the thought, “Okay, I have one day left to enjoy all of this.” And here I am, living each day in this beauty.

It is still hard to believe.

Even the way I sleep has changed. My body works harder than it has in a long time. There is such a satisfied feeling in crawling into bed after a nice shower and a day spent outside. In the city, I longed for that feeling.

Now, there is a different kind of tired. It is the tiredness that comes from working with your hands, walking the property, carrying things, gardening, tending to animals, and simply being physically engaged with the world around you.

My sleep is much deeper and more restful on the farm.